Incredible Stories of Psychic Powers
Ronald Brak: Tell me about your son’s psychic abilities, Madame.
Aunty Intellectual: Well, my son had a dream that we went to the zoo and I wouldn’t let him out of the car. Then, when we did go to the zoo, that’s exactly what happened.
Ronald Brak: That’s incredible.
Aunty Intellectual: And what’s more, my husband had a dream that he jumped in the chimpanzee enclosure and was made king of the apes.
Ronald Brak: And is that what happened?
Aunty Intellectual: Yes it is! They’ve been able to reattach one of his generative organs and he’ll be released from the hospital on Tuesday.
Ronald Brak: Astounding!
Aunty Intellectual: And that’s not all. I myself have psychic powers. Often I will be thinking of one of my friends and my friend will ring me.
Ronald Brak: That’s incredible. How often does this happen?
Aunty Intellectual: Everyday! I spend most of my time thinking about my friends and calling them.
Ronald Brak: And how many friends do you have?
Aunty Intellectual: Oh lots! Dozens! Three. Except I’m only talking to one of them right now.
Ronald Brak: One last question, Ms Intellectual. When the phone rings are you even consciously aware of the fact that you’re answering it?
Aunty Intellectual: I try to spend as little time conscious as possible.
Ronald Brak: Thank you for your time Ms Intellectual, as I have now sucked it out of you using temporal vampirism.