There are many people posting pictures of guns on facebook today and I just have to mock them by sticking captions on them. The scary thing is I only have about three facebook friends. Is that a stable situation? Three gun nuts and one gun knocker? Oh, excuse me. I have to go now and chase that red dot that's just appeared on the wall opposite my open window.
Damn! I was just chasing a red dot and I saw all these holes in the wall I never noticed before. What will my landlord say?
Great! Somehow I've managed to cut myself on the back of my arm and the front of my arm at the same time and I only have one band aid.
And there's another hole in the wall! Where are they all coming from?
Oh typical. Gavin Just showed up with a smoking gun and asked if he could borrow some bullets. When I said no, he asked if he could borrow my hunting knife and I said no because it's mine and I paid for it and it cost me like $4 and I bought it at a police auction and it was made in Brazil and it's probably been used to kill like real Brazilians. Then he karate chopped me in the neck and that didn't work because I have no reflexes and then he ran away crying because he hurt his hand. What a wuss.
The police just turned up at my flat. I told them, no you can't have your knife back, I paid for it. And they said no, they wanted to know if I knew anything about a man firing a gun in the area. I didn't tell them anything. Mates gotta stick together.